Each person has a story, something that shaped them, molded them, made them who they are today. Because of my many roles - daughter, sister, friend, wife, mother - I have both my own stories and all of theirs. Each of my roles has its own narrative. As well as its own interweaving with another's story. Every time I write an entry, I tend to share more of their stories than my own. At times, I feel inextricably enmeshed in these other stories.
Lately in this blog, the stories have not been mine. They have been kid stories, or diabetes stories, or random thoughts that don't have very much to do with me but instead skim the edges of my own story. One of the items in my now defunct mini-life-list (cruelly slain by that bastard diabetes) was to blog every day. I made that goal in the hope of telling not just more stories, but better stories. It is painfully easy to jot down what my children say through the day, they are more than enough humor for all of us (like last night? Brigit was "ROCK GIRL!!") but in terms of me, and my own story, I'm not sure it tells as much. It doesn't challenge me to go beyond what is said and into the truth. I'm not trying for pretentious depth here, just more exploration maybe? More of me out there? Perhaps we're back to my old friend, free therapy by cathartic soul purging online.
Anyway, these are the thoughts that have been blowing around the attics of my mind. Who am I? What do I write about? I don't identify as a "mommy blogger" because I think it's a limited term. I write about more than my kids, those wacky monsters with their funny shit all day long. I'm not just someone who writes about what it's like to be married to someone with chronic depression, because HELLO, how funny would that be? And I'm also not just telling you what I had for lunch (turkey sandwich with havarti cheese - I love havarti - all those holes?).
So what am I? Tonight I am a wife/mother/writer, enjoying the end of a heatwave, excited about moving this here blog from Xanga to Blogger (you mean I can save a post and publish it when I'm ready? Whaaa?), hungry for more guacamole.
I am Liza, and this is my story.
2 hours ago